A perfect storm of bad homebrew GMing choices

I like my DM. He’s a decent guy. He’s living a life he agrees with, I don’t entirely, but I am OK with him as a person. He’s decent enough. But he has managed to create a situation where cliches have literally become the rule. The one rule of his system is that cliches from other high fantasy things are the rule.

My DM has been playing /tg/ for a while now, some years. He has had 3 longer groups in his setting, which he considers pretty consistent. There’s a big undead ruling polity across most of the world, which I was told was caused by a group. That’s nice.

The problem is, we neither have access to any collected tome of fluff nor crunch. We are literally on our own here. We have to ask the DM when we need data. We have no idea about averages, weapon damages, movement, anything. We don’t use any charts, tables, grids. There’s a lot of winging it. The setting supposedly spans continents, but we barely know a thing. We keep getting things on a need-to-know basis.

Hitpoints are somewhat irrelevant: We all have a similar amount of them and damage comes completely randomly, there’s an armor soak mechanic that I saw applied once but never understood it. The game uses only d10’s, so guess what damages are like. I’ll give you a hint, daggers do 1d10+11, exploding dice, weakest weapon. Random horseshit pops up every now and then, things like xd10 to everyone around for interrupting a spellcaster in any way during casting. I am trying to put into words just how retarded that is but it’s hard. Imagine trying to turn on a dynamo flashlight and a guy passing by walks into you and you both, plus people in the vicinity, suffer an IED explosion. I realized that the GM may have powergamed me, because I have a pretty incredible undead regen that works off of any blood, and I effectively have triple the max HP anyone else has, regaining a third with any man-sized corpse drained. This is the only thing I really know for certain, everything else is completely random; I am fairly sure the GM is just making up based on what the dice roll. Obvious high v low? Hit. d10’s provide so much chaos, it’s impossible to try and calculate anything, the possible variance would make a weatherman mad.

And this is where we try and figure shit out, we try and work out some system to the madness, but what do we have to work from? We have no official sources. Ah, but what is the official source? It is a doc file that the DM has been rewriting for several years, making it more and more unreadable. It is his heartbreaker. His high fantasy heartbreaker.

I am literally playing fantasy RPG #6584794.

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~ by fatrpgdongs on 09/07/2012.

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